


Brother

by Macs_Paperclips



Category: Hawaii Five-0 (2010)
Genre: Angst, Angst with a Happy Ending, Crying, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, Fluff and Angst, Gen, Gunshot Wounds, Hallucinations, Implied/Referenced Suicide, Nightmares, Panic Attacks, Platonic Cuddling, Platonic Relationships, Platonic Soulmates, Poisoning, Tears, Temporary Character Death
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-09-21
Updated: 2020-09-21
Packaged: 2021-03-07 23:42:11
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 1
Words: 4,048
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/26586058
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Macs_Paperclips/pseuds/Macs_Paperclips
Summary: Danny never thought about what would happen if he someday was forced to kill Steve.Until a nightmare shows him.And Steve is the only one able to help him out.
Relationships: Steve McGarrett & Danny "Danno" Williams
Comments: 9
Kudos: 43





	Brother

**Author's Note:**

> This isn't my first fanfic, but the first one that i uploaded on AO3... i'm totally clueless about tagging...
> 
> Also, the title is a reference to the song "Brother" by Kodaline.
> 
> This story was inspired by a Hawaii Five 0 Edit with that Song: https://youtu.be/R1hauOKki1E
> 
> Also this story is slightly inspirated by MacGyver Season 3 episode 11
> 
> English is not my first language, so i'm sorry for grammatical errors.
> 
> Also thanks to:  
> stormchasinchick32  
> and  
> the-phoenix-heralds  
> on tumblr for beta reading  
> \------------------------------------------------------------------------

_Though we don't share the same blood, you're my brother and i love you, thats the truth_

_Kodaline - Brother_

He forced himself to keep going. Every muscle in his body ached and his lungs stinged. And the fact that he was carrying the dead weight of a 6.2 feet, 190lbs Navy SEAL on his back didn't exactly made it easier.

Also the Parth trought the forest he was taking was not ideal. Danny just prayed he wouldn't slip, dropping Steve, hurting him even more that he already was, thanks to the stupid, fucking, paralysing poison the stubborn Neandethal thought it was a good idea to inhale while searching the suspects house.

Well actually it wasn't his fault… The Bad guys… that where now all laying dead in their house with gunshotwounds to their head, thought it was a good idea to slip a mask with some poison on Steve's face from behind. It almost immedeatly had knocked him out and Danny, furious and worried about his best friend showed them what a Gun was.

And now he was carrying the unconcious Steve on his shoulders.

Speaking of wich, He slowly gained back concouisnes, letting out a pained groan.  
„Hey, sleeping beauty, nice that you're finally awaky“ Danny tried to joke.

Steve just groaned again.

„Stop"

his voice was barley audible. Danny just shook his head „we have to get out of here“  
Steve swallowed convulsive, trying to gather enough strenght to speak.

„Danny… please“  
The lack of power in the usually so though mans voice made Dannys heart sting. Sighting he slowly dropped him from his back, carefully leaning Steves upper body against the nearest tree and stretching his own aching body. Steve looked bad. Really bad. His breathing was flat and heavy, he was covered in sweat and his gaze swifted unfocused in the distance.

Danny dropped on his knees beside him, grabbing Steves chin with his hand looking into his eyes. They where bloodshot, pupils dialated. „Hey“ he tried to get Steve to focus on him „You good?“ surprisingly Steve didn't even denied the fact that he was miserable. Closing his eyes, he swallowed again and licked his dry lips.

He looked in Dannys eyes. „No… i'm not good Danny“  
His Partner froze for a second, knowing exactly that if Steve actually addmited that he was not fine it had to be really, really bad. „Okay“ he said standing up, trying to grab Steve under his arms to get him up. „Lets get out of here“

Steve threw a undcordinated, weak hand in Dannys direction „No“

Danny opened his mouth for a second about to start ranting, then he just sighted and pulled his phone out  
„Okay, i'm gonna send the team our cordinates… so the medical team can pick us up here“ he was relived when he saw that he had signal again, and shot a quick text to the team. When he turned around again Steves head was lolled to the side.

He looked up at Danny.  
Something in the blue-green eyes of the SEAL made Dannys blood run cold. The next words where just a whisper, still they where the worst words he ever heard in his life.

„I'm dying, Danny“.

For a second Dannys whole world just stopped . And then a major Deja-vue hit him. Steve next to him in a plane, heavily breathing, bleedig out and barly alive, saying exact the same words.

„No! You're not“ Danny said with a shaky voice, totally overpowed by his partners words.

„Danno…“  
Steves voice was so soft. It was the kind of voice he usually used for Grace and Charlie… or kids in general „I know this kind of poison… i saw it in the Navy… there is no antidote… i'm not gonna survive this“

„No!“ Dannys voice was only a paniced whisper by now, he tried to hold back his tears. He already knew Steve was right, but he didn't dared to admit it to himself. He tried to argure it, wanted to tell Steve that he would be strong enough to pull trough this. But he just couldn't.

He just slumped right next to Steve to hold him. He hugged him tightly. Silently crying, Steves head on his shoulder, trying to process what was just happening,  
„You know…“ Steve croaked hoarse „i think you should go…“

Danny lifted his head „What the…“

Steve interrupted him. „It's gonna be really bad to watch… i saw it a few times… what this stuff did to these soldiers… i don't want you to wittness that, Danno“

the Detective was silent for a moment. Then he gurmbled as firmly as it was possible „Fuck you,Steven. I'm not leaving you“

Steve didn't answered he just let out a heavy breathe. Danny heard him swallow and felt how he hesitated before he spoke up again.  
„Then… then i’m gonna have to ask you for a favor.“  
Danny, now gulping on his own, looked in Steves pained eyes.

„Anything“

he whispered.  
Steve closed his eyes for a moment. Again he hesitatey. Then he quietly spoke up  
„I hate that i have to ask you to do this… but… as though as i am, i really don't want to go through this and i can't do it myself cause i'm too weak…, so… could you please…“ he took a deep breath as the pain in his chest grew even more when he thought about what he was about to say.

„please shoot me“

Danny just scrambeled back, with a horrified look in his eyes.

„Steve…“ he breathed out „No!“

Steves face was sadder than Danny had ever seen „I…i just want it to be over.. “

Danny, now standig, just stared at him „you can't expect me to do this… you know what you're asking me there?“ his voice was a high pitched, paniced screech.  
„I… i can't kill you“

„You're not… i'm gonna die anyway… you just making it easier“ Steve answered with a almost numb simplycity.

Danny rubbed his hands over his face pacing back and fort. „I… i can't do that, i can't shoot my best friend dead…my…my brother… what am i supposed to tell my kids… and the team? “

„The truth…“Steve answered, now not even able to hold his head up anymore „I asked you to…“ Danny remained silent.  
„Brother, huh…“ Steve said instead and Danny gulped. „You're one to me too… so please… don't let your brother suffer longer that he has too…please…“

Danny took a deep breath and squeezed his eyes shut.  
He pulled his gun out of his holster, the metal feeling cold against his hands. „I… i got 2 bullets left…“

Steve nodded weak. „ s' enough“

Shaking, Danny liftet his arm, just to drop it again, right after he pointet it at Steve.

„I can't…“

„You can" Steve wispered „i need you to do it“

Danny liftet the gun again. Putting his finger on the trigger. Steve closed his eyes

„It's not your fault buddy… and i love you, brother“

„I love you too“ Danny murmured, fighting against the lump in his throat, gripping the gun tighter.  
„Do it“ his Partner mouthet.

Danny pulled the trigger.

For a moment he just stood there, staring into nothingness, the gun falling from his hand.  
His ears where ringing and his vision was blurry. He slumped down on his hands and knees, totally paralised. Slowly he became aware of what he just did. A choked sob escaped his mouth and the tears streamd down his face. He actually did it… He had killed his best friend, his brother, his platonic Soulmate.  
He had no more control, a the sobs whacked his whole body.

God, what did he do?!

He feeled a soaking wetness on his hands and looked down. Blood. So much blood, all over his hands, he was kneeling in a pool of it.

Steves blood.

This was the moment when Danny looked up for the first time.

Steve looked peacefully, his eyes closed, muscles slumped. It almost looked like he was sleeping, if it wasnt for the bloodleaking gunshootwound in is temple.

The wave of nausea hit Danny like a trainwreck.  
And before he even knew what was happening he threw up.  
Again and again until there was nothing left.

Crying and spitting he sat back against another tree. Then, he felt it, still next to him where he dropped it,

his gun.

With one bullet left.

After what he just did, he would never be able to forgive himself. He would never be able to talk to the team again. And Grace… god, Grace would never even look at him again. And Charlie too, when he was old enough to understand.

He didn't wanted to think further about it.  
He brought the gun up to his head. He deserved it after what he did, didn't he?

The cold metal agains his temple, he slowly put his finger on the trigger. Steve would have hated him for doing this, but Steve couldn't complain. He took the easy way out and Danny could do that too.

Somewhere he heard his name, the team was here, calling them. For a second he thought about what it would to the team to loose both of them.

But he pushed the thought to the side, gripping the gun harder.  
His vision blurred from tears, as he squeezed his eyes shut, trying to ignore the voices calling is name. He couldn't classify them. Was it Lou? Adam? Junior? Tani?

He didn't care. The only person that could have stopped him was dead.  
All because of him. It was his fault.

„I'm sorry… i'm so sorry, Steve“ he mumured, not able to stop his tears.

„DANNY“ the Voice came even closer. „DANNO“

He recognized the voice.

Was that?

But this was impossible…  
Steves Voice came closer, calling his name, again and again…

***

With a gasp, Danny shot up from his nightmare, sittig in the bed, two big calloused hands gripping his shoulders tightly but comforting. Dannys slowly looked up in his partners concerned face, eyes worried, standing next to the bed.

With a chocked sob he threw himself in his partners arms

„Steve!“

it sounded like a drowning person gasping for air.  
Gripping his hands in the fabric of Steves shirt, soaking it with tears, they just stood there.

Well, actually if it wasnt for Steves tight grip, he would have probably just slumped down to the floor, because his knees almost gave out.

Holding him up with one arm, Steve stroked his best friends back in slow cirles with the other one.  
Slowly, under the touch and warmth Danny calmed down until the last whimpers vanished. Burying his head in Steves chest, the taller mans heartbeat almost seemed like a lullaby.

Danny heard the low rumbling in Steve's chest as he spoke up. „You're good buddy… everything’s okay…“ Danny just slowly nodded. He knew Steve was right. Even if his own heart was still not back to ist normal amount of beats per minute he know he was gonna be okay. Because Steve was here, very much alive and well.

And for now that was all that mattered.

***

Steve wasn't entierly, sure what woke him up. The only thing he knew was that he never woke up without a reason. He listened into the darkness. There was nothing besides if the crashing waves outside.

Then he heared it again. It was just a small sound but it was enough for his instincts to kick in.

With one smooth motion he had threw his covers back, was out of bed and already reaching for his gun on the nightstand.  
Only then he realised what that sound was.

Crying.

Out of the guestroom.

Danny.

He put the gun back, Put on a T-shirt and walked over to the other room.  
He slowly opened the door.

„Danny?“

His Partner was lying there, in a mess of sheets. Crying and clearly having a panic attac in his sleep. He came closer.

„Danny!“ he said again, this time firmer. The answer was just a whimper. „DANNY“

he leaned down to grip his shoulders.

„DANNO“

Just another whimper.  
„i'm sorry… i'm so sorry, Steve“ Danny murmured in his sleep.

Steve’s heart stung.  
He gently shook Danny, trying to wake him up, calling his name again and again. „Danno!... come on… wake up buddy“

Danny woke up with a gasp, shooting up in the bed, his whole body tremling. His blue eyes shining with tears.  
Steve could basically see all of Dannys emotions in them.

Panic , fear, sadness, grief… all at once.

Slowly Danny looked up at him, focusing on Steves face. Crying out his name he launched himself at Steve‘s chest. Steve almost stumbled back on the impact. Danny was holding on to him like he was drowning.

Steve hold him up, so he wouldnt fall down, Slowly drawing circles on Danny’s back.

Deep inside him, Steve was shocked to see Danny like this. He witnessed him having nightmares, as well as the other way round, but it never was so bad…

Ok, maybe the reason it was so bad was the hallucinate preperate Danny got injectet with today. The hospital cleared him, but told them to watch him for the next 48 hours, wich actually was the reason Danny was sleeping at Steves house in the Guestroom.

He feeled that Danny calmed down a little bit and softly spoke up. „You're good buddy… everything’s okay…“  
Danny nodded, still gripping on his shirt.

„Hey, you wanna lay down?“

Steve asked after a while. „Yeah“ Danny whispered hoarse, sitting back down on the bed.

Steve helped him to lay down and tucked him in. He sat next to him and carefully brushed a strad of hair out of Dannys face.

He was to tired and exhausted to even complain.

Steve stood up, thinking Danny fell asleep again, about to go back to his room, when Danny grabbed his hand.

„Can you stay? Please...“

Given the state Danny was in, Steve didn't even wondered about Dannys request.

„Sure“  
he said softly, Laying down on the other side of the bed. Danny immediatly scooted closer draping one arm around Steves chest to feel his heartbeat.

Steve chuckled softly  
„You're using me as a Teddybear?“ he asked.

Danny, nose nuzzled in Steves shoulder, murmured, almost inaudible: „Just need to feel that you're alive“

Steve scooted one arm under Dannys head, slowly stroking his back.

„Yeah, buddy i know how that feels.. “

They where silent for a minute.

„Thank you"  
Danny murmured then.  
„For what?“ Steve asked, slightly confused.

„For staying…i don't think there are a lot of people who would share a bed with someone who just had a panic attac and now is cuddling with them“

„Hey“ Steve answered „I love you and i care about you. Of course i stay if that is what you need. You would do the same for me, man“

„Hmmm“

Danny murmured sleepily. „Love you too, pal“

Steve smiled when he heard how Dannys breaths finally evend out and he fell back asleep. A little while later Steve also fell asleep. Luckily dreamless.

***

His body naturally woke him up at 5am. Normally he would have gotten up for his run and swim, but he neither wanted to wake Danny, who was still nuzzled close to him up, nor he wanted Danny to wake up alone, which would maybe send him panicing again.

With the faint light coming in trough the windows he finally, really could see Dannys face.  
He looked awful.  
His eyes where puffy, his hair a complete mess and the dryed streeks of tears where still visible.

Bit at least he looked peaceful now.

No sign of panic or another nightmare.  
That was good.

Steve dozed back to sleep.  
Then he felt Danny shifting next to him, and him getting up. Steve stayed in bed, acting like he was still sleeping, knowing that Danny would need a moment alone.

It was just 6am. Usually not really Dannys Time.

He heard the Backdoor open. Danny was probably going down to the beach sitting down at the Lanai.

10 Minutes later Steve followed him outside with 2 big mugs of coffee.

„Thanks“ Danny murmured, not even commeting on the big melting piece of butter in Steves mug, when he handed him his mug.

He looked a little better. He had washed his Face and definitly had tried to comb his hair back in the usual position. It was still a little messy, but that didn't matter.

Steve sat down.

For a minute they both just looked at the ocean, sipping their coffee in silence.

After a while Steve quietly spoke up:  
„You wanna talk about it?“

„The nightmare last night?“  
Danny asked back

„Yeah… only if you want to of course“

„No, no… it's probably better if i talk this off…“ Danny said, rubbing his palms over his eyes.

Steve just nodded, not wanting to interrupt him.

Danny swallowed. „So… you where poisoned with some kind of nerve gas and i had to carry you trough the jungle… and then you asked me to put you down, so i did.“

Danny took a shaky breath and Steve instictivily took his hand.  
„You told me you where not gonna survive it… that you saw that poison in the Navy and there was no antidote… You asked me to leave because you didn't wanted me to witness it… but i refused to“

Danny gulped again, fighting the lump in his troath.  
„You than asked me to do you a favour and… i said i would do anything…“

He paused, reaching for words.  
„What favour?“ Steve asked softly.

„You…“ Danny couldnt hold back his tears anymore „You asked me to shoot you Steve! You said you didn't wanted to suffer anymore and you couldn't do it yourself, cause you where to weak…and“

Dannys sentence was cut of by a chocked sob escaping his lips.  
Steve shifted closer, putting his arm around him. Again slowly stroking his friends back.

„You know i would never ask you that“  
he said after a while.

Danny quietly nodded.

Then he looked directly into Steves eyes.  
„You know what the worst thing is?... i did it… i actually did it… i… i killed you…“

„No you didn't! You would never! It was just a bad dream, Danno"

„I know“  
Danny looked down  
„But it felt so real…“

„Yeah, thats the thing with dreams“ Steve said softly  
Danny spoke up again  
„When i realised what i did… i broke down… and then… i… i remembered that i still had one bullet left“

Steve eyes grew wide „No…“

„Yes…“ Danny said… „I just thought about that the team would never talk to me agin, and my kids would never look me in the eyes again if they knew… and… it seemed like the only way… i heard the others calling me, but it didn't matter… the only thing that pulled me out was your voice…“

„Oh, Brother“ Steve sighted „that drug really did a number on you…“

„Yeah“  
Danny laughed humorlesly.

His face softend

„You called me that too, in my dream by the way“

„Brother“  
he added when he saw Steves confused Face.  
„I told you you where like a brother to me and you said i was one to you too“

„Yeah, i think thats what we are“ Steve answered. „Besides of a old married couple“

Danny snorted  
„Yeah, besides of that, of course“

For a moment they just looked at the ocean.

„But, just to be clear… i would be the big brother“  
Steve grinned at Danny watching how his face slowly crumbled.

Frowning Danny answered „You're aware of the fact that i am older than you, right?“

„Just a little over a half year! And i'm taller than you!“ Steve shot out immediatly

Danny, now full in the Bickering mode grumbled „That doesn't count! Even my little Sister is taller than me, and Grace is also gonna out grow me soon. Besides i'm way more mature than you!“

„Marture? Who was the one who asked me to stay when you had a panic attac?“ Steve teased.

Now Danny almost exploded

„I was drugged, you idiot! And also… i'm always the one who has to hold you back when you get a stupid idea and run off directly into danger!“

Steve opened his mouth but Danny interrupted him „You know what? I'm not in the mood for this right now! It's way to soon in the morning.. we would probably be twins, okay? Same age! No big or little brother, end of discussion“

Steve grinned and shrugged

„okay"

He paused for a moment.

„But you know… even with twins there is always one who is the firstborn…“

Danny grumbled  
„Just shut up Steven… you're a stubborn Neanderthal Animal and nothing else…“

Steve grinned. „But you still love me“

„Sometimes i hate you…“ Danny mumbled.

„Really?“ Steve teased  
„The fact that i have half of your liver in my body says otherwise!“

„Oh, great“ Danny argured „Now you come up with that story… by the way that whole thing was probably the cause of my nightmare last night“

„Huh? How was that the cause?“  
Steve was confused.

Danny glared at him for a second, then his eyes turned sad „That thing with telling me that you're dying… you did that in the plane after you where shot“

Steves eyes grew wide „Danno… i'm so sorry… i didn't thought about that…“

Danny shrugged. „Not your fault, man…“

„You know“

Steve said after a while „it's probably my turn to talk about my feelings about that whole situation…“

Danny raised his Eyebrows „Go on“

The Navy SEAL took a deep breath.

„When i woke up in the hospital… and i saw you in the bed next to mine, still unconcious… i almost freaked out…i just felt guilty i dragged you into that mess and you got hurt because of me“

„Thats not true…“ Danny said.

„Felt like it…“ Steve sighted

„Then Kono came in and i asked her what happend…the whole thing! You landed that plane…“

„I crashed it“ Danny corrected

Steve ignored the comment. „You landed the plane… on the beach, even if landing on the water would have been way saver…“

„Didn't want yo to drown…“

„You didn't even got yourself checked out! You had busted ribs and still went to raid that drug place… thats just crazy“

„Yeah, once in a while i am allowed to pull of a McGarrett Move“ Danny pointed out.

Steve chuckled, then his face shifted and he swallowed.  
„And then you came back and didn't evev hesitated to give me one half of a vital organ…i… i just couldn't belive that you just did that without thinking twice! For me…“

Danny opened his mouth but Steve didn't let him speak.

„And i was angry… angry that no one really aprecciated it… i got all the presents, and cards and everything and no one thought of you… you where the hero there, you saved my life and no one even mentioned it…“

Danny shook his head

„Honestly i didn't gave a fuck about these stupid cards… the only thing that mattered to me was that you where alive and okay…i literally watched you dying in that plane bleeding out and i coulnd't do anything… i don't know what i would do without you… i don't wanna imagine a world without you in it…“

„Yeah, same Brother… my life really would suck without you“ Steve answered and Danny smiled.

Suddenly both of their stomachs grumbled at the same time.  
Danny snorted and Steve didn't even tried to hold back his laugh

„What would you think?“ he asked „if we take the day off, grab some malasadas for breakfast and when school is over we pick up Grace and Charlie and make a little trip to the northshore“

Danny already stood up

„Thats probably the best idea you ever had… i'm in“

„Great! Lets go“

„Let me guess, you're gonna drive?“ Danny asked

„of course i'm gonna drive“ Steve grinned, walking up to the house.

Danny rolled his eyes „You're a controlfreak… but i love you..“

Steve smiled

„Yeah, yeah i love you too…“


End file.
